Bad Guy
by Jacquie-0
Summary: The room is starting to spin. My head is heavy & his cologne is making me sick. Whatever, it'll be over soon enough knowing him. It's gonna be rough. There will be no lovemaking in this apartment tonight. Only violent sex. The best kind. - Effy's in a particularly self-destructive mood late at night & booty calls an occasional fuckbuddy. Oneshot. Lemon.


Keys clang as they crash and slide on the cracked granite tabletop. Door slams shut. Think it's locked. Don't remember. Luckily everything's muted right now. Don't think I could handle the noise. Let's add more.

"I'm the bad guy…"

Remote hits the couch, no sound heard over the floor-vibrating bass. My mental space is filling with the violent beats, pushing out violent thoughts. Too exhausted to think. Or to fight thoughts. I'm giving in tonight.

Random sound in the back of my skull. Door knock? Doorbell? Don't care.

Door's cracked. Damn. Guess I forgot to lock it.

"Eff?"

I pretend to not hear anything. Music's loud enough. Decently plausible. I light up another smoke, dirty boots on the coffee table.

"EFFY!"

I puff harder & faster til I'm hidden in a cloud of smoke. Leave me alone. My head hurts. Don't wanna talk. Don't wanna think. Want something to drink.

Music gets stopped suddenly. The abrupt silence is excruciating.

"The FUCK?" I stand, throwing my empty cig pack on the table where my boots have left a mark. I grab the remote & turn the music back on.

Tony takes it from me & lowers the music. I move to grab it back.

"Eff, stop, just for a second. Please."

I roll my eyes and let gravity sink me back down into the couch, boots kicking the pack over a few inches. I barely have the energy to move my body. I rarely have the energy to talk. I don't think I have the energy to listen, especially not right now. I resume smoking without looking at my brother. At least the music's back on, although it's not nearly loud enough. His voice is grating to my ears.

"The fuck was that back there, Eff?"

I cough. He sits next to me. I inch away further.

"God, you're such a dick. Why do you always have to ruin everything?"

Oh, that's rich. Me? Me ruin everything?

"Right, me."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm the bad guy, duh."

"Oh, shut up. You don't always have to be."

"Ha, Tony Stonem, talking about being on good behavior. Never thought we'd see the day."

"That's not what I — Eff, you can have fun without shitting all over everyone else, y'know?"

"Can you now? Maybe that IS my way of having fun, hmm?"

"Look, I know shit sucks right now, but don't take it out on me, Eff. It's me, Tone. Shut everyone else out, sure, I can't fault you there, not like I'm any better, but every time you do this, I have to take the fall for it, ya know that?"

I blow out another long stream of smoke.

"Maybe you do. Maybe you still don't care. But I'm the only one you have left. And soon I may not be here either. Keep it up, rockstar. There's only one way this is gonna go. We both know that. I'm tired of cleaning up after you. Call me if you decide to stop being a raging bitch."

He stands & I turn up the music again to play him out. Sounds like downstairs is brooming the ceiling again. Fuck off. They should thank me. Better than the shit they blast. Huh. Guess it is a bit late. 3AM? Meh, maybe late for them. I'm just getting started.

Is there anyone who'd be awake that wouldn't annoy the fuck out of me right now? My contacts list is too full. I don't know why I bother saving these people's numbers when I'll never talk to them again. Maybe that guy in 4A is still up. Maybe he'll appreciate the wake up call if not.

But that requires moving something more than my thumb. LMNOP…. Hmmm, Peter? He's usually just bumming around at home right about now. He usually requires incentive to move, too, though. Maybe I'll send him a pic of my tits & write, "come over." Seems like the least amount of work. Done.

I grab whatever's on the booze shelf & a glass. Last clean one. Score. Sitting back down to pour, door sounds. He knows I "won't" hear him. After a minute, he'll just come in. Doubt Tone locked the door on his way out.

Door shuts & I see Pete's crooked grin. I raise my bottle to him & jerk my head to signal him to join me. Music's still loud enough to drown out talking. Just the way I like it.

"My favorite sound is your silence."

He doesn't waste time. I like that about him. His hands are already around my waist, groping me, pulling my shirt down, teeth on my earlobe. I smirk & pour another glass. He's trying to kiss me. Ugh, I'm busy - lit cigarette in my left hand, now around his shoulders, whiskey glass in my right. I indulge him for a second so he'll move on.

He loses interest pretty quick. Thank God. His mouth is on my neck; I'll probably have marks tomorrow. That's always fun. His hand is moving down my front to unzip my jeans. There we go. Puff puff, pass. But just for one drag, you hog.

He's saying stuff in my ear, but I can't hear and don't care to listen. Music's better than whatever he has to say. Here, have a drink. At least he's pretty decent at the non-verbal communication. I shoot the rest. He grabs a fistful of my hair and pulls my head back after I slam the glass on the table.

About time. I smirk hazily up at him. He's over me now. I puff & blow right into his face. He wasn't expecting that & slaps me. My smirk turns into a grin. Ready? Set? Go…

Hand to my neck, choking and asphyxiating me slightly. More. Lips slamming down onto mine, he bites my lip. Can't help but grin through the kiss. Now that's more like it. Hurt me. Make me feel something.

He takes my cigarette & finishes it off by blowing the smoke into my mouth and tossing the butt into the empty glass on the table, before accidentally kicking it over. It nearly falls off the table. I almost laugh. Why is destruction so amusing?

My hands are free; he's got a bit more of my attention now. Good thing I don't give a shit about this shirt cos he's just ripped it, taking it off me too impatiently. I let myself rag doll for him so he can throw me around. He likes it when I do that. Gives him the illusion of control over a helpless little girl. And it's less energy expenditure for me.

He's climbs on top of me fully, knees on either side of me on the filthy red couch. He takes his shirt off proudly. I'm pretty sure he doesn't do much more than work out, so sure, be proud, hot stuff. Doesn't mean I still don't find it funny.

It's a game for him. It's self-destruction for me.

He smells good. Bet he washed his dick and sprayed some cologne on for me. More'n I'd do for him. I probably smell like shit. Out all night 'round a bunch of dirty junkies. Makeup smeared as per usual. Hair's a mess. I'm a mess. Nothing new. Horny fuckers couldn't care less as long as a tight pussy's involved. Works out for both of us then, I suppose. Wish I could feel more right now.

He rakes his nails down my chest. Harder. It's no fun unless blood's drawn. Gimme some battle wounds. He needs to crank up the fire. Been a minute. Maybe he forgot how I like it. He bites my shoulder. Good. Still not hard enough, but enough to give me some fuel to move.

I smack him to startle him & take advantage of his surprise to slide out from underneath and push him down so his bare back is against the couch cushions. There are so many sounds, smells, tastes, feelings; everything's overwhelming my senses. Just how I like it. Fill up every inch of my being so there's none of me left inside. Hollow me out so I'm even more of am empty shell.

I'm on top now, taking off my bra & pants. Like to leave those undies on for the tease. Gotta have some level of control. Always. I show him how to bite by breaking the skin on his chest. He yelps in pain & slaps me harder after I sit back up on his lap, genuinely angry. My smirk returns. Now we're getting somewhere. I need angry. Nothing else can keep up with me in my extreme state of self-loathing. I need to be abused. Don't try to love me. Treat me like the piece of shit I am. Use me & then throw me away. I'm typically a single use only kinda gal.

I reclaim his mouth with mine to distract him from his irritation, but then bite his lip just a little too hard. He growls fiercely. He tries to push me off of him, but I hold on tight, squeezing my thighs against his. This is gonna be fun. A real ride. He's fighting under me. I won't let go on any front. I won't budge an inch. You know what you got into, bitch. Bring it.

My nails dig into his back & he's squirming around under me real hard now. I feel like I'm on one of those buckin' bronco things. Man, I miss horseback riding. Random thought, come back to the present. Fuck, I'm drunk, but I'm always intoxicated on some level, so I'm still more lucid than I'd like. I still know who I'm with. I'm still awake…

God, why is this so difficult right now? Need him to make me feel something. I dig my nails in deeper & scrape my teeth against his lower lip. I taste some blood and grin. That's the final straw. He shoves me off, and my back hits the coffee table. FUCK, that hurts. I grunt then laugh as the pain sets in. Yesss! That's it! HURT me, asshole! I'm your enemy. I'm not here to show you a good time. And you're not here to get to know me. No one will ever know me. I make sure of that. Try & you'll regret it.

He stands over me; blood, scrapes, & hickeys abound. I love it. He looks like an enraged predator about to attack. Good. That's what I need. I'll play prey for a while, but you know you better give it your all. He leans over me, one hand on the table beside me, his other comes up and slaps me so hard I'm sure my cheek is immediately red. My eyes instinctively close as I wince, and I breathe in sharply. I exhale cathartically. Do it again.

I stare into his eyes challengingly as he put his hand on the other side of my head. You see it, don't you? The defiance. You'll never break my will, though. It's ironclad, unlike his. I know him. If I push him too far, he'll leave. But I kinda don't really care tonight. All bets are off. His other hand raises and slaps me just as hard across the other cheek. A laugh escapes my mouth as I flinch. I can't stop laughing. This just pisses him off further. I can't stop—

He swallows my sounds with his mouth & this time my lips are the ones bleeding. Mmmm, so good. I might as well be a vampire, I love the taste of blood so much. This kiss is mean & messy. Just how I like it. Don't give me sweet; I only want bitter & salty. His knees are pinning mine down. It hurts. A lot. You don't give a shit if I'm comfortable or not anymore, do you? Excellent. Now you're remembering who I am.

He grabs my wrists & holds them over my head with one hand twice the size of my own. I love how he towers over me. I feel so pathetically small with him. Matches how I typically feel emotionally. His other hand yanks off my panties & his jeans. Of course you're commando. I shouldn't be surprised, but I guess it's been a while so I forgot that was your usual m.o. You're such a fuckboy. But I guess that makes a slut then, huh? I smirk at the thought as he slams his mouth against mine once more.

The room is starting to spin. My head is heavy & his cologne is making me sick. Whatever, it'll be over soon enough knowing him. Good thing I'm not here to get my own rocks off. That'll probably happen tomorrow morning 'cause I'm sure I'll pass out right after he leaves. Never know, though. Is there more booze in the cabinet? Oh shit, you're there.

It's gonna be rough. There will be no lovemaking in this apartment tonight. Only violent sex. The best kind. Ow, fuck, you could be a little more conscious of what you're doing, though, god. I push his face off of mine & slap him in punishment. He gives me this 'oh no you didn't' look and slaps me back before I can start laughing again, letting go of my wrists. He thrusts into me painfully as his hand goes to my throat. I wrap my legs around his waist & use my newfound freedom to throw my arms around his neck. He reads my mind and picks me up, continuing to fuck me 'cause I'm so small & he's so big.

He stands and carries me clumsily to the bedroom. Sure, why not. He throws me onto the bed haphazardly, disconnecting us for a moment. I almost puke as I hit the bed. Ugh, I'm gonna feel this tomorrow. He grabs my leg & pulls me towards him as he climbs over me, turning me over roughly. My heart pounds in my throat in anticipation. I love it from behind. He goes in deeper. It kinda hurts.

I feel his warm hands sliding under my cold thighs and up to my hips. Okay, I'll admit it, you got some pretty good moves. I grin as his firm grip tugs me up onto my knees. Slick. I steady myself on my elbows, spreading my legs a bit more for him to move between them. I grab handfuls of dirty sheet in each fist, burying my face in my pillow. I feel him open me with one hand, the cool air making me acutely aware of how wet I am. He's at my entrance again. He doesn't waste a second. He knows his time is running out at this point.

My breath is shallow and ragged until it abruptly stops for a moment when his hand clenches around my neck again. I gasp for air, suffocating suddenly. He lets go just so I don't pass out, grabbing a fistful of my hair instead. I love how much he changes it up. Keeps my attention. I have little of it, too, so that works for me. He knows I bore easily. I wish I could feel more inside, though. I wish this weren't just something rote, mechanical. Going through the motions.

I feel his nails rake down my back & my mind gets brought back to the present. Oh, yeah. That's it. Make me bleed. Make me feel SOMETHING. He slaps my ass. Hard. I yelp. I don't have to turn around to know he's grinning now. He thinks he's in control. It's cute. I'll let him have the illusion for a while longer. I'm not done being abused. Give me all you got, big boy. Go ahead and get fuck me til you cum. It's great not having to be in charge for once. I'm so sick of having to tell everyone what to do all the time. I just wanna be left alone.

My mind keeps wandering, but the slapping & slamming into me is bringing me back. He's speeding up, thrusting harder, going deeper. He's getting closer. He's filling all of me up, and in spite of myself, I think I might cum, too. Shit. I forgot how good it was this way. He's so big. It really has been a minute since we fucked. We should do this more. His hands go to my tits and squeeze. We're moaning in unison now. I'm starting to slip out of my mind finally. The temperature of my body is rising, and I can feel my skin flush as the heat spreads over it. More, more, more, dammit!

I'm bouncing off his pelvis and his hands go back to my hips, pulling me back against him rhythmically roughly. A final thrust and he buries himself in me, going further than he's gone before. He stays there as we both cum, practically screaming through our orgasms. My throat is hoarse from all the noise making. Good thing I don't care about disturbing the neighbors.

He grinds his hips against my ass for a moment before pulling out and pushing me away from him. I collapse onto the bed, face hitting the pillow. I hear him panting behind me. We're both trying to catch our breath. He knows I won't let him rest beside me. He's tried it before.

I don't move my head as he gets up and walks out of my room. I listen for him to finish getting dressed and leave the apartment, slamming the door behind him. I turn over onto my back, and my eyelids start to close. My mind goes back to the kitchen cabinet, but my body is starting to relax. There's a conflict in me briefly as I think about my unlocked front door, all of the lights in the apartment still being on, & the living room stereo still blasting music. Nah, fuck it. I'll deal with it all tomorrow. I roll over onto my side and pass out. Tomorrow. It'll come too soon. It always does.


End file.
